


if you still bleed (i'll curb the damages)

by donnamosss



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/F, anyway clarke and lexa r in Love can u believe, still gay still Suffering bc of the fckin 100
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-24
Updated: 2016-02-24
Packaged: 2018-05-22 23:57:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6098150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/donnamosss/pseuds/donnamosss
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“i’m sorry you won’t get justice for your people.”</p>
<p>“justice is not the same as revenge, clarke,” lexa pauses, “you taught me that.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	if you still bleed (i'll curb the damages)

**Author's Note:**

> title from still love by great caesar which is literally. about clarke and lexa.

the sun has just dipped below the horizon when lexa finds clarke sitting alone in front of one of the fires in camp, crushing small sticks and watching the flames spark as she tosses them in. the flames dance yellow orange across clarke’s furrowed brows and for a moment lexa catches a glimpse of the _wanheda_ who inspires such fear and respect in people, but _wanheda_ disappears quickly and she can see only clarke, the girl who fell from the sky and tries her hardest to keep everyone safe. lexa eases herself down next to the other girl.

 

“thank you for your counsel today,” she says by way of greeting.

 

clarke nods brusquely, her mind clearly elsewhere. she snaps another stick, tosses it in. an ember lands on her hand and she shakes it off quickly. she drops the rest of the twigs she has in her hands and purses her lips.

 

“i just…can’t believe they would do this,” clarke mutters, staring intently at the fire, “after everything we’ve done. after everything I did at mount weather…” her voice cracks.

 

“clarke…” lexa delicately places her hand on clarke’s clenched fist, a gentle offering.

 

“i did that—i mean, i _killed_ those people so no one else would have to die!” clarke’s fist unclenches slowly and her fingers curl around lexa’s, “and now it feels like it was all for nothing.”

 

“you did what you had to do, clarke,” lexa sucks in a breath, “i don’t know how much of a comfort this will be to you, but were i in your situation, i would have made the same decision. and it will not be for nothing. we will make sure of that.”

 

clarke swallows and looks away, her grip on lexa’s hand loosening. lexa wonders if she has crossed one of the many hastily drawn lines that seem to surround them lately. but then clarke shakes her head and says,

 

“i’m sorry you won’t get justice for your people.”

 

“justice is not the same as revenge, clarke,” lexa pauses and a wry smile flashes across her face. when she speaks again her voice is softer, “you taught me that.”

 

a sound halfway between a sob and a laugh escapes clarke. they are both silent for awhile in the growing darkness, the sounds of the camp fading as the night watch takes over and people go to sleep, preparing for the long ride back to polis in the morning. clarke’s hand is warm and familiar in lexa’s and lexa tries not to think about what that means.

 

“indra is right,” lexa says suddenly, looking at the fire instead of at clarke. clarke’s head jerks towards her in surprise, “it will not be easy to convince people that this is the best course of action.”

 

men laugh and shout in the distance. “i will need help,” lexa says, shifting to face clarke.

 

clarke smiles faintly, “well,” she says, her voice thick, “it’s not like i'll be getting a warm welcome in arkadia anytime soon.”

 

lexa’s thumb swipes quickly over clarke’s, “i hope you know that you are always welcome in polis, clarke.”

 

for a minute clarke looks like she is going to cry, but she blinks rapidly and untangles her hand from lexa’s. lexa feels the absence sharply. clarke hesitates before running her fingers lightly over lexa’s jaw,

 

“good night, lexa,” she says quietly, and lexa swallows thickly, her skin warm where clarke’s touch had been.

 

clarke turns towards the tents and lexa watches until she disappears behind a flap of fabric. she stares at the flames until they burn down into embers, and when she finally heads back to her own tent hours later, she can still feel the ghost of clarke’s touch on her face.

 

* * *

 

the next day, lexa and clarke ride side by side towards polis. the woods around them are alive with the early morning sounds of the world waking up and, when clarke glances over at lexa with a small smile on her face, lexa can’t help but feel like they are (slowly, cautiously, gently) building something together once again. later there will be discussions and strategy and shouting and intimidation and questions to her authority and a long, hard road to peace but for now there is her, and there is clarke, and there is birdsong in the woods. it’s enough.

 

**Author's Note:**

> dialogue is decidedly Not my strength so naturally i made this entire thing dialogue. 
> 
> anyway, im on tumblr @ lesbianscullys and the 100 is still ruining my goddamn life. im in hell.


End file.
